Here come the southern cavalry!

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Picture by electrapix

In the kerfuffle of  hurled words and accusations,  it’s easy to overlook significant details. One such in recent days was a remark by the Deputy First Minister, Martin McGuinness.  The second was a letter in the Irish Times.

McGuinness’s comment is, as usual, blunt and to the point. He made it clear that he would not go down as the Sinn Féin minister who presided over cuts affecting the poorest in our society.  Yes, we’ve heard that before, Bur he then added that the Taoiseach Enda Kenny had shown “a level of detachment” about the north’s financial crisis.

A bull’s eye on both points. Sinn Féin, in its anxiety to grow, needs to be careful to protect its working-class base. If it doesn’t. the People Before Profit group could well move in and steal their clothes. Mr McGuinness does equally well in pointing the finger at the Taoiseach Enda Kenny.  Over the decades, the south has veered from standing idly by to marshalling all of the south’s media to presenting the northern problem as one of  violent republicans only.

And now a letter-writer has come up with a suggestion. Since the south has always prided itself on its commitment to peace and justice in the north, it can now put its money where its mouth is and provide the few million needed to bridge the gap and keep the Stormont institutions running.  After all, Mr Kenny never tires of telling the exhausted people of the south that he has turned the economy around and that they’re growing like billy-o.  Think how it would attract admiration, Enda, if you were to treat the northern population as your  fellow-Irishmen and women on this island.  The sight of Charlie Flanagan at tomorrow’s talks is indeed an inspiring sight, but it’s no substitute for a financial leg-up.

Will we see such a leg-up from Fine Gael? Of course we will; just after Enda has extracted his eyeballs, added HP sauce and eaten both of them.   

12 Responses to Here come the southern cavalry!

  1. Iolar June 1, 2015 at 9:31 am #

    Crisis, what crisis?

    In the ‘The Wretched Earth’ (Fanon 1963:43) refers to “…foreign influences in the core of the colonized people… .” Natives are not called to God’s ways but to the ways of the colonizers. Today on RTÉ, King Lear features in the weather forecast, “Blow, winds and crack your cheeks… .”

    The Ceann Comhairle has ruled out the prospect of the Dáil being recalled this week amid claims that the independence of the Dáil has come under attack. Members of the Coalition are “deeply conscious” of the need to protect the rights of TDs in light of the political storm involving a prominent businessman. The Opposition is demanding that the Government intervenes to resolve what it describes as a “constitutional crisis” involving the Houses of the Oireachtas and the judicial system. There was an absence of such a reaction when words uttered in the House of Commons resulted in the deaths of citizens and members of the legal community in the north of Ireland, Belturbet, Monaghan and Dublin. The silence from politicians throughout the 26 counties about the Panorama programme on security force collusion that led to deaths, injuries and destruction, has been deafening.

    One notes the frequent use of the terms, “Parliament” and “The Speaker” in common parlance. The media in Dublin is preparing for a “parade of political Pinocchio’s” in the autumn, a comment that articulates more than a “level of detachment” about a pending election and the status of politicians. Food for thought indeed as Easter 2016 approaches, however, there are a wide range of other sauces available.

  2. Argenta June 1, 2015 at 11:40 am #

    When will you be removing that photo of you and Enda from your blogspot ?Is its continued presence meant to be ironic?Maybe a photo of Martin and yourself would be more appropriate !

    • Jude Collins June 1, 2015 at 12:02 pm #

      Good man Argie! You got the irony thing at last…On the other hand, I’m getting a bit bored with it. Any suggestion besides the Marty one??

      • RJC June 1, 2015 at 12:49 pm #

        Maybe pose for a photo wearing nothing but an Orange sash.

        • Jude Collins June 1, 2015 at 7:28 pm #

          Maybe not, RJC. Don’t want to frighten the horses…

      • Belfastdan June 1, 2015 at 12:59 pm #

        Kim Jong-un – always available for a photo opportunity!

      • Argenta June 1, 2015 at 2:09 pm #

        You and Stephen Nolan(if there’s space for you in the photograph)!!

  3. ANOTHER JUDE June 1, 2015 at 12:21 pm #

    Jude, leave the photo alone, it is an iconic image. Unless you have one of you and Arlene Foster doing a jig? Or you and the late Ian Paisley brewing up some poteen? Or maybe a picture of you Gregory Campbell at the All Ireland?

  4. Perkin Warbeck June 1, 2015 at 2:21 pm #

    It is with something approaching profound melancholy, Esteemed Blogmeister, that one feels compelled to draw your attention to the incontrovertible fact that this disregard for the Folk on the Udder side of the Black Sow’s Dyke is a two way thingy.

    To explain: the good egg-chasing and up to recently happy chappies of Ulster did not stand up for the monster-sized men from Munster in Kingspan Ravenhill for the Final of the all-black Guinness Pro-12 on Saturday. Or at least, certainly not in the numbers confidently anticipated. Shoulder to shoulder, like,

    As if the absence of both the local 15 and must-be-seen super-supporter R. ‘Roar on the Ulsters’ . McIlroy wasn’t bad enough.

    What precisely is going down here?

    Can it be that the Uncle Toms and other goms of Munster Fusiliers and their supreme sacrifice in the pogrom of the Somme, on behalf of the poms and in an ambiance of psalms, has been forgotten?

    That rabid, burnt offering so mellow and dramatically captured by that son of Ulster, Frank McGuinness BA. (no relation) in his version of the Dirty Dozen; ‘Observe the buns of Munster sashaying with aplomb towards the Bomb ‘.

    Could it be that the Ulster chaps chose to stand up instead for their fellow Scots, despite the quare gunk they received from the recent deplorable electoral result in Thistleland? Or that , on account of the wat nicht that was in it, what with the danger of their clobber being contaminated by the clabber, they decided to say a’ hame with the wee wifey an’ wains and watch a re-run of Bonnie Prince Charlie’s visit on the telly?

    Such a pity. The last appearance of Paulie (no surname, no pack drill required) on Planet Ulster before His Ascension into Toulon, deserved something better of a So-long.

    One chooses the A-word with the two dues: deliberation and diligence. For, just as he did, at this time last year, prior to the the Ascension of BOD into Planet Punditry, Paulie was being referred to as ‘ yer man’ by one, Gervase Thornley of The Unionist Times.

    The surest of signs that canonisation is just a grubber kick away.

    G for Gervase is the ultimate Arbiter of Good Taste for the Twickerati and other Alickados and is the go-to pundit on all oval-shaped matters. It is he who, in the dullness of time, decides who does or does not get the supreme accolade: The Crown of Thornley.

    The rest of the fleecy media flock, bleat meekly and fall into line.

    The rug. cor. of The Unionist Times has also been the brand leader too in scolding the nouveau riche of rugby in the land of Le Frog. For weeks, months, years now he has relentlessly gone, erm, through the phases, fulminating against Le Cheque Book tactics of the greasy tillionaires who purchase Les Clubs du Rugby in La Belle France.

    Indeed, most of the merde has been directed at Mourad. That would be Monsieur Mourad Bougjellal, le boss of Toulon RFC who, according to the jibing scribe of Tribe TUT, made his argent from (gasp) le biz du comic strip.

    And Charlie Hebdo thought he got it rough?

    For years now, since just before Willy John (or as he used to be known by the hackitariat in the FSS, Bill,before they went all shoulder to shoulder) McBride hung up his size 15s, Paulie was already being,erm, groomed to take his place. And in all that time and a half (added on) Paulie has shown himself to be the most loyal son of Munster’s.

    Which is why so many of the confusiliers travelled north by north east in a diagonal direcition last Saturday all the way from Cahirsleeveen to Ravenhill to watch the sun shine for one last time out of what Les Frogs call, ‘le bacque cracque’ of their beloved what was billed as: Last-look Thomond v Loch Lomond.

    But, dat was din and dis is now.

    Like, before Monsieur Le Comic Strip came with an offer of a different strip, the comical gansey of (gasp) Toulon.

    Now that Toulon has robbed the peatlands of Eire to pay Paulie, twill be interesting, in a cavalier twill class of way, to hear quel chanson the rugby scribe of TUT will be whistling l’annee prochaine/ an bhliain seo chugainn / next year.

    Peut etre: ‘And Munster long a province, be a club side once again’?.

    Peter Canavan has often been described as ‘the best scrumhalf’ Ireland never had. No such flight of the imagination was ever indulged in with regard to Le Paulie and the game of the Paddy Stinks and the Mickey Mudds: bogball.

    My Goodness, My G., one couldn’t descend that low, could one? Unless one of course happens to be a Warbeck. (It is one of the,erm, perks of being a Warbeck as we like to say within the confines, mind you, of Warbeck Towers).

    So, Perkie must come clean and admit that in his modern opinion Paulie would have made a magificent Full Back on a Limerick bogball team. For the full five minutes be’d be on before being black carded. After that, he would have cut a mighty figure as a Maor Uisce. Plenty of bottle, that sort of thing. Par excellence, indeed, as Les Frogs put it.

    To conclude not unsuitably with a lame Limerick, Esteemed Blogmeister, and to do with the difference in the way we in the Free Southern Stateen treat our sporting Goliaths as distinct from the sporting Davids in Norneverland:

    The sad departure of want-ad Paulie
    Has left us all so unashamedly bawly
    Peter the Great?
    Just did not rate
    Yer man from d’roundabout of B’gawley.

  5. Am Ghobsmacht June 3, 2015 at 9:04 am #

    Hats off for using the word ‘kerfuffle’ Dr C.

    • Jude Collins June 3, 2015 at 10:54 am #

      It’s dirty work, AG, but somebody has to do it…

  6. John June 6, 2015 at 1:43 am #

    I too must also admit Jude, that for yonks now, the photo of your good self, alongside the not so good self, Edna – has quite puzzled me. Very. In fact, i don’t know why i’ve never mentioned it before, or how it came to be.
    My vote for a new picture would be you and paddy-k (if he’s not too shy).

    As regards Edna sending money ‘up North’ – There’s more chance of The Irish Sunday Dependent or Times asking you if you’d like to write a full page Editorial, with your very own choice of topic.