Money and how to avoid it

The British Secretary of State has just announced the budget for our stateen. Stormont, we gather, has overspent by some £300 million, and the fear was that Chris Heaton-Harris would deduct it from the block grant that the British government hands to this  shamelessly impoverished slum-corner of the UK. Omigod! Don’t do it, Chris old chap – it’ll put us in the poor-house. But relax, people. Chris H-H is a kindly man and has good news: he’s going to allow us to spread repayment over two years. Yipee!

The British government’s allocation of moollah each year is a subject that is raised every time there is talk of a border poll. Sure the south couldn’t afford us, unionists (and others)  insist – who’s going to give us money the way Westminster does? Certainly not the impoverished south. 

It’s hard to keep a straight face when unionist politicians peddle this line. For a start, we don’t know how much we get from Westminster – it’s a sizeable sum but it’s not nearly as big as unionist politicians claim, because large portions of the block grant are syphoned off to support Britain’s armed forces and to contribute to the life-style that the Royals currently wallow in.  Britain knows this uncomfortable fact, Ireland knows it, unionists can’t bear to admit it. The other thing that tickles my funny-bone here is that unionist politicians insist that having a large sum stuffed in our begging bowl  is something we should be proud of.  Sure who else is going to give us that amount of moolah?

There’s another, uncomfortable way of looking at this, and that is, that  NEI is a failed state, has been for a hundred years. What else would you call a state that can’t sustain itself without huge financial propping up each year? Compare this with the south, which is supposed to be impoverished and backward: it’s looking at a budget surplus of some €10 billion this year and around €16 billion next year. Yes, I said surplus. Anybody who can count, even it involves using their fingers and toes, should be looking for a piece of that action: if they’re pulling in that kind of money, why can’t we?

But alas – we are uber-British, and we don’t want any links with the south or the EU. They might make us prosperous.