I was talking to a man yesterday and I was startled when he asked me a question: “Why are there not more unionist republicans?” I assumed I’d misheard him but he repeated it – yes, he’d been talking about unionist republicans. Why was it that those who want to maintain the link with Britain all see this in terms of a monarchy? After all, there are quite a few English republicans. But here, all unionists curtsey to the crown.
However their loyalty to that monarchy is conditional. They will stop being loyal to Britain and the queen should the monarch of that country become a Catholic. “Conditional loyalty is no loyalty at all” this man said. “That’s like you telling your wife on your wedding day that you’ll love her as long as she stays beautiful”.
And speaking of beauty brings us to Prince Charles and his former mistress now his wife, Camilla. They descended among us yesterday and were busy moving from place to place being introduced to ordinary mortals by the Lord Lieutenant of Co Fermanagh Viscount Brookebrough. Although the Lord Lieutenant acts more in a protective role, really: coming between Charles and the commoners in case he should meet someone who is inappropriate or who might say something inappropriate. So think of the Lord Lieutenant as less conduit and more condom.
I remember when I lived in England around the time of Queen Elizabeth II’s silver jubilee. An Irish Catholic priest took the opportunity in his homily to show his loyalty to the monarch by praising the work QE2 did, saying it certainly wasn’t a job he would want to have. I was scornful of his comments at the time: there is no disputing the fact that the royals live in the cosy lap of unspeakable luxury. But now I realise there’s a price to be paid for everything. And the price Charles and Camilla and Co. must pay is boredom.
How brain-scrambling to go from place to place, asking deeply dull questions like “Is it hot in that straw hat?” and receiving the amazing answer “It certainly is”. How grindingly predictable to be given yet another piece of bog-oak sculpture, another bunch of flowers, another teapot or painting or bit of Belleek china. All of which will be stored in some obscure vault and never looked on by the royal eyes again. So yes, wild luxury but also brain-mincing boredom. Assuming there are brains to be minced.
But to come back to the question the man put to me: why aren’t there more unionist republicans? There must be at least one such who thinks it might be better to have the head of state elected rather than through use of the frightening system of genetic Russian roulette that prevails today. Come out, come out, wherever you are…
Dr C
Did you ever read ‘On Royalty’ by Jeremy Paxman (I think that’s what it was called)?
The first few pages sum up the monotony of Royal life pretty well.
And I know I’ve mentioned this before but I love this quote from Conan the Barbarian:
“There comes a time, thief, when the jewels cease to sparkle, when the gold loses its lustre, when the throne room becomes a prison…”
As for the Unionist republican idea, well, some of us are only just getting reacquainted with the idea that one can be a Protestant and Irish so it’s a bit of a leap to go from there to unionist republicans.
Though I would truly love to see a political party of that nature spring up in NI.
As well as Irish monarchists (as in those who want a united Ireland with a royal head of state).
Not to mention a ‘proper’ Irish republican party i.e. one with no nationalist baggage.
A modern day United Irishmen sort of thing.
Am Ghob :
Glad to see you’re a lover of Bob Howard’s grand purple prose. I too loved Conan the Barbarian stories back in the day. “Red Nails” was a particular favourite. There’s much to learn about base life in all that old pulp fiction.
The kind of party I would give allegiance to would be one led by the likes of Eamon McCann whose bullshit detector would not allow him to insult any of our collective intelligence..i could offer some respect to a man who can obviously walk and talk at the same time and also see the absurdity of life too. His would be a socialist view of sorts..
People are so easily suckered and sucked in by the “glamour” of fame and celebrity that they seldom question what living in that goldfish bowl actually entails.
Looked at from another angle, having royalty as something to look up to, locks ourselves and a specific family into a particular mental prison,in perpetuity.
It’s what we do in zoos where otherwise free and wild animals are caged for our curiosity.The idea of royalty may also appeal in an old world fairytale way. Prince Charming and Cinderella rising above her station…. and so on.
Some may want to be comforted by the idea of never having to worry about money or where to sleep if the mortgage isn’t paid or having your toothpaste squeezed by some lesser lackey, who they can look down on ,, but who would choose a life of smelling fresh paint and muttering banalities on a daily pre-planned rota.A place where every move you make is supervised and everything, even your very death is pre-planned and packaged …
.That doesn’t sound like such a good deal to me. The love of royalty may have more venal, class-based reasons for existing but it doesn’t really stand up to any kind of logic.The weeping throngs who thought they loved Princess Diana because she changed overnight from a “Cinderella” to a simpering fashion-plate had no “real” reason to approve of her other than she represented their own escape from an obscure life to one lived in the full glare of “Hello ” magazine.
As for the gifts handed, untouched to the royal servants by their simpering subjects….well I sort of assumed that there was a huge storeroom full of this stuff building up for years… .At one end there was a sort of skip and one of those crushing machines like the one in the “Goldfinger” movie…you know the one that crushes the car at one end and passes the resulting movement out as a nicely symmetrical cube….. Maybe….maybe not…..
The visit of Charles and Camilla begs questions about the concentration of wealth in the hands of a few individuals. Why? On the same day as the visit, the population in this part of the world was being threatened with further reductions in the Health Service by Simon Hamilton, the current Finance Minister. He made the statements in the context of Welfare Reform. Why did the Finance Minister target the Health Service in particular? In 2004 the chairperson of the Policing Board raised questions about the cost of establishing public inquiries. We were advised that the cupboard was bare and that costs would have to be met by reducing expenditure in Health and Education. Then as now there was not a single shred of evidence given to justify cuts in service provision. When a minister talks about welfare reform, there is a need to interrogate his meaning. He is talking about cutbacks not reform. It would be interesting to have a debate on the tax paid by transnational corporations, performance related pay, subsistence and expenses instead of attacking some of the most vulnerable groups in society by reducing spending on welfare, health and education services.
My favourite fact about Camilla is that she went to a top fee paying school in South Kensington and also received private tuition from excellent tutors. From this highly expensive and privileged educational background she managed to scrape one O-Level. Why anybody pleads loyalty to these people is utterly beyond me.
I just read the following on BBC website about Royal couple’s visit to Palace barracks in Holywood
”The Duchess of Cornwall spent time with families on the base before joining children for an Easter egg hunt in the garrison church”
That’s my second favourite fact about Camilla
Jeffrey and Gregory and co. would have a fit if the British ever considered removing it`s hateful anti Catholic rules. I would love to see the religious element to Nationalism and Unionism removed, I would still be Republican if the Monarch was Catholic but there are very few DUPs and UUPS who would stay loyal to a Mass going King or Queen. I admit it must be an awful bore having to visit these boring towns, always remembering to drop in on the local fort, got to keep the royal/military link in the public eye, but the pay isn`t bad and you get loads of holidays.”
“every day…….