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I don’t know what all the fuss is about. Gregory Campbell is quite right: of course interviewers should avoid approaching over-70s. For a start they sort of, you know, smell...Like that odour you get in a room that’s been locked up for some time. If you stand too near them, the drop on the end of their nose is likely to sprinkle itself on the knee of your nice new trousers; and they’re so sloooowww – you have to budget in ten minutes for them to cross a room and sit down, before you can start questioning them.
And then things really get irritating. You have to repeat each question five times, because the silly old fools can’t hear you unless you practically yell it into their one good ear. They keep forgetting what the question was and start rambling on about the time they were Head Girl or played centre-forward on the school team. You’re there to find out their views on nuclear physics and they keep mumbling about Ovaltine; and they’re forever breaking off to totter to the toilet because their tedious old bladder can’t hold things in place for longer than six minutes.
We all know these things but it took a man of Gregory’s calibre and courage to come out and say them. By way of proof he can point to James Galway. And note how he is all-inclusive: when he gets to 70, Gregory has told his family, they’re to let no interviewer near him. Sauce for the goose and all that. So good man, Gregory. I for one look forward to a day, which will I hope come very soon, when we won’t be forced to listen to such people as Queen Elizabeth II, Pope Francis, Mick Jagger, David Hockney or Roger McGough.
And Gregory himself? Only eight years to go…


Jude ..you forgot to say they are forever breaking wind….i thought you nearly did, mind…..
Maybe Gregory now wishes his family had shown the BBC’s ‘Real Lives’ team the door back in 1986 rather than be reminded of his threat in that revealing piece, regarding the response of his pals in loyalist paramilitaries if Britain were to pull out of his wee colony. To quote Greg the fleg, ‘The troubles would look like a picnic in comparison to the death they would inflict in the aftermath of such a betrayal’. Nice man Gregory.
Peer pressure
The ‘democrats’ appear to have used the above criteria to rule out granting Freedom of Belfast to James Galway.
Old people are just like weans minus the cute factor.
Can we now assume that the boul Gregóir is now in favour of the abolishment of the house of lords!!
What a sour man. Is there anyone else who thinks Gregory is in need of a dose of Syrup of Figs or is it Epsom salts..
Gregor the Wise is as ever correct.
It is the height of youthful impertinence to question anyone over 60. These elders should be allowed to hold forth on any subject without interruption given the enormous wisdom they have amassed over the years.
I am petitioning the BBC to introduce ‘Elder Hour’ where an elder can be allowed to speak live on air for up to one hour on a subject of their choosing without an adolescent like Nolan interrupting the flow with his asinine observations.
I’m hoping Gregor the Wise will put his own name forward and Jude the Just of course, plus many others too numerous to name.
Jude shouldn’t you declare an interest you must be well over 70… 🙂
What a shocking thing to say, neill. Wash your mouth out instantly…
Gregory’s family would be doing everybody a favour, especially Unionism, if they wouldn’t let Gregory near an interviewer NOW, never mind when he hits the age of 70 or 75. He’s not too far from that age anyway so we only have to put up with Gregory for another few years until he’s put into a nursing home.
Team McIlroy unavailable for Interviews
When Rory was a Brit the crowd used roar
As he hit near Sixty for almost every score
McIlroy was the man
Below t’Biblical span
Now that he’s Irish he shoots Four Score.