‘Gossip’ by Joe McVeigh

It is estimated that the average person speaks 18,000 words a day. That is what I read and I cannot dispute it because I have never checked it. I suppose that, if it is true, most of us would indulge in some kind of gossip. It might be harmless or it could be malicious. Harmless gossip does not damage another person’s reputation. Malicious gossip most certainly does.

Gossiping is a favourite pastime in Ireland. During the so-called Troubles years ago, there used to be notices put up in Derry and Strabane, and I am sure in other places as well, which stated LOOSE TALK COSTS LIVES. This was during the era of touts and supergrasses and undercover agents.

I think we might consider putting up notices to the effect GOSSIP DESTROYS PEOPLE AND COMMUNITIES. It is very easy to start a rumour about somebody but it is extremely difficult to stop it once it is out there. There are those who thrive on repeating gossip. They are the first with the most recent story. Reminds me of a story about a priest in the west of Ireland, in a very quiet parish. Nothing much ever happened there. So in order to get a bit of excitement going now and again he used to make up fantastic stories and he knew a neighbour was very good at the gossip. He would tell him this fantastic story and then warn him not to mention it to a sinner. Of course he couldn’t wait to get out of the house to go to the pub that evening to tell the first person he met the latest ‘confidential’ story from Father McGillicuddy. It was all a bit of fun but that’s how rumours start.

Now, I suppose there are people who like to entertain and make other people laugh with their idle gossip. But there are people who gossip in a way that causes others hurt and damages their good name. They may do so deliberately or they may not be aware of the harm they are doing. Either way they need to be confronted and told clearly about the damage they are doing to someone’s reputation and to the community. It is for their own good that they also need to be told. Gossip can become a way of life for some.

Often hatred, jealousy and resentment of someone can lead to gossiping. It can also make some people feel important to be able to reveal something about somebody in the public eye. I was told lately by a man who should know better that a priest whom I know well was rather ‘fond of the bottle’. Now I happen to know that this man has not taken a drink in about 40 years. When I asked the man how he knew this he replied ‘Ah, I’m only saying what somebody said.’ There are quite a few ‘somebodies’ out there who must be very busy spreading their gossip. They must have noting better to do. I heard a well known former Donegal footballer say on Radio that unfounded gossip destroyed his marriage and nearly destroyed him as well. It makes me angry.