Brits Suddenly Interested In The North Of Ireland Since They Colonised It – by Newry Spud

 
English loyalists and unionists across the UK have confirmed they’ve never been as concerned about “community safety” in this part of the world since their ancestors arrived here during the Tudor conquest and decided the best way to make friends was to take the land, rename half of it, and act shocked when people noticed.
 
Following a horrific knife attack in Belfast, online patriots immediately sprang into action to do what they do best: ignore the victim, ignore the facts, ignore the police, and use one man’s suffering to stir up enough racial division to power a bonfire on the Glorious 12th of July.
Police have arrested one man. Not a race. Not a religion. Not every person with a slightly different surname than “Smith.” One man.
 
But that hasn’t stopped the usual Poundland empire loyalists from treating the six counties like a Netflix documentary they can use to justify the opinions they already had before the attack even happened.
 
A spokesperson for “PEOPLE WHO DEFINITELY AREN’T RACIST BUT”, said: “We’re just asking questions,” before asking no questions and instead posting 14 Union Jack emojis under a blurry screenshot they got from a man called Big Rab’s Patriot News Updates.
 
The victim deserves compassion. The people who tried to help deserve praise. The police should be allowed to do their job. And the racist ghouls using blood on a Belfast street to push their dirty wee agenda deserve to be told exactly where to go.
 
Because if your first instinct after a brutal attack is not “I hope that poor man survives,” but “Great, this’ll be good for my anti-immigrant Facebook post,” then you’re not defending the community.
You’re the reason it needs defended.

3 Responses to Brits Suddenly Interested In The North Of Ireland Since They Colonised It – by Newry Spud

  1. Another Jude June 11, 2026 at 2:44 pm #

    It is hilarious to witness people like Farage and Tice and every GB News presenter talk about this place. A part of their so called United Kingdom they wouldn’t be able to point to on a map in fact they probably don’t know which hemisphere it’s in. They threw their fellow citizens under the proverbial bus during the brexit negotiations. Their loyalty is all one way of course.

  2. Surveyor June 11, 2026 at 4:42 pm #

    But it’s perfectly fine to march against the Jewish community and chant “from the river to the sea” etc.

  3. Another Jude June 11, 2026 at 6:18 pm #

    It is perfectly fine to march against Israel carpet bombing civilians. What is not fine is to call for Jews to be slaughtered by Islamist factions. There is a difference.