The Meaning of Life – by Joe McVeigh

The Meaning of Life: a book by James Bailey

By Joe McVeigh

 

In a recently published book The Meaning of Life-Letters from Extraordinary People by James Bailey which was reviewed in the Guardian the author includes the replies of some people who were asked to contribute to the book. This is the response from Kathryn Mannix , a Palliative Care consultant:

 

“Every moment is precious, even the terrible moments. That’s what I’ve learned from spending 40 years caring for people with incurable illnesses, gleaning insights into what gives our lives meaning. Watching people living their dying has been an enormous privilege, especially as it’s shown me that it isn’t until we really grasp the truth of our own mortality that we awaken to the preciousness of being alive.

 

“Every life is a journey from innocence to wisdom. Fairy stories and folk myths, philosophers and poets all tell us this. Our innocence is chipped away, often gently but sometimes brutally, by what happens to us. Gradually, innocence is transformed to experience, and we begin to understand who we are, how the world is and what matters most to us.

 

“The threat of having our very existence taken away by death brings a mighty focus to the idea of what matters most to us. I’ve seen it so many times and even though it’s unique for everyone, there are some universal patterns. What matters most isn’t success or wealth, or stuff. It’s connection and relationships and love. Reaching an understanding like this is the beginning of wisdom: a wisdom that recognises the pricelessness of this moment. Instead of yearning for the lost past, or leaning into the unguaranteed future, we are most truly alive when we give our full attention to what is here, right now.

 

“Whatever is happening, experiencing it fully means both being present and being aware of being present. The only moment in our lives that we can ever have any choice about is this one. Even then, we cannot choose our circumstances, but we can choose how we respond: we can rejoice in the good things, relax into the delightful, be intrigued by the unexpected, and we can inhabit our own emotions, from joy to fear to sorrow, as part of our experience of being fully alive.

 

“I’ve observed that serenity is both precious and evanescent. It’s a state of flow that comes from relaxing into what is, without becoming distracted by what might follow. It’s a state of mind that rests in appreciation of what we have, rather than resisting it or disparaging it. The wisest people I have met have often been those who live the most simply, whose serenity radiates loving kindness to those around them, who have understood that all they have is this present moment. That’s what I have learned so far, but it’s still a work in progress, right to our final breath.” The Guardian Supplement  22.03.25)

 

This is a thoughtful response to a serious question that I think is worth sharing. Earlier this year I was a frequent visitor to a local Palliative Care centre. I witnessed the great work being done there by nurses and staff. For that reason, this response of Kathryn Mannix means a lot to me.